Dear Logbook, nineteenth day of a new life.
Yesterday, my diary, we met at noon with Rafa and Paula and the little sailors. And in the afternoon with Artur. A great day.
And today what to tell you. The day has come. The one that craves a lot when you start an expedition of this kind. That day that when you have to take a leave, it means going back to what I’ve been doing continuously since that March 6, 2002. And I can say, I’ve been doing it all that time in the same company, in my house, My other family, which, as with families, has given me moments of joy and moments of sadness. Moments of happiness and moments of anger. But deep down, I still rely on them to move forward in the world of work. Today is the day I return to the office, but this time I don’t visit. It is true that during this expedition I have been visiting the office frequently, it has helped me to continue seeing people. I, who recognize that I love talking to people, because being there has made me feel within the working world even if we talked about myself, about time, about whatever it was. It has been part of my therapy. The fact that I was able to be very active during this expedition has made me able to carry everything better.
Today my diary, after leaving the little sailors in the School, I return to the road by bicycle to work. In part, I recognize that when I was visiting, I had a hard time getting out of there heading home. On the other hand, I return to work physically feeling quite well. Not without discomfort, because I am sincere when I say that a month and a half or two months ago my body aches less. The famous and blissful side effects are doing theirs, but nothing that incapacitates me on a daily basis.
My Diary, you well know that I had never written anything until that September 16, except for the typical exercises during my school stage. I started this with the idea of being able to tell you my Diary how I was going through the trips on the high seas, to tell you whether or not there was a rough sea (nausea and/or vomiting), if I found myself more tired than normal, or what It was happening to me. But my Diary, never in the life of this group had it occurred to me that a simple Diary in which it reflected my feeling, almost always guided from my heart of ‘Pucelano’ and dry land, I never thought that I could write for so many days in a row on a similar subject. That is why, as I never thought I would write every day until today, I do not know how much more this Diary will follow. Now I only have one goal with this Journal, to be able to tell you how I keep finding myself. I do not know if I will reach the end of the rehabilitation that would be on May 8, I do not know if it will be before or if I will continue after that day. Nor can I tell you my Diary if I will be able to continue writing day after day. It would make no sense to do it for doing it. I think I can give you little more. I do not know. I do not want, my Diary, to think that I am going through a bad time or a very good one and that is why I think this is the time to stop. I think it is something that should take its course and see if I can tell you something else.
That is why my Diary, today I am telling you that tomorrow I do want to write you something, because I must tell you how my return to “normality” has been. That life that will resemble something that I had until that day August 22 when they give us one of the hardest blows of our lives. But I think that Marta, that wonderful person whom I love and who has behaved heroically, much more than me, and I, will have strengthened.
Anyway, my Diary, tomorrow more.